Skip to main content

Clouded mind



It all seems blurry but……

I’ve been feeling a bit out of it lately…Not particularly sure why but this swing in moods is hard to explain. It’s a combination of a lot of things running through my clouded mind. Life in general is a challenge which in the process of survival leads to clouded mind. I guess you just gotta pick yourself up and keep moving on huh..I know it’s easier said than done but it’s the only way forward.
Every time I feel like I’m closer to that breakthrough, something knocks me right off my feet Which lands me back at square one. This alone makes me want to throw in the towel but that voice whispers “that’s not an option” each time I think about that move. I make all the right moves and the right decisions but then end up flat on my face. Why?? Have i not given it my all? Or are they simply tests to see how much I Can handle? These tests are unbearable most times but it’s surely molding me into the strong individual that I am today. I couldn't imagine my life without the inner strengths I've been granted in this lifetime. Probably would have been on drugs or six feet under. I can’t begin to illustrate the types of obstacles life has thrown my way in this lifetime. I've seen it all, been there, done that and worn the T-shirts in all colours.
Life is just a journey but no one is sure of the destination. Maybe things would be better if you really knew that which is ahead?? Who knows, but either way, I live life one day at a time and pray for more inner strength, knowledge and understanding to deal with what comes along with it. The burning desire to succeed keeps me focused and sane….Well it drives me insane sometimes if I’m honest but I guess it’s part of the process.
The journey continues……..

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Fragment

Who am I? Who am I? That's the question most of us often ask ourselves daily. The journey to that answer is never ending as I'm yet to find out myself. Do you really know yourself? If so, how? Who are you? What would be that robust definition of 'yourself ' if I or anyone asked? Maybe you think you know yourself but not quite. In order to  KNOW yourself, you MUST find yourself.  Not sure if that makes any sense but think about it for a minute. I'm not referring to common things like favourite colour, food, etc, I mean the emotional connection you have with the soul.  How deep is it? Is it deep enough to fetch you the answers you are YET to encounter? See? so much more to that journey than you think, right? There was a little boy who grew up angry at the world - with different emotions running through him; it was hard to stay on the road of sanity.  He went through so much pain and hurt, his feelings became numb.  Well, to some extent.  The ...

Deceit...

Isn't it funny how we all want a good man or woman when searching for love but don't know what to do once they come along? You come across as someone that knows what he/she wants but when deeper into the relationship, you are confused all of a sudden. That's just too pathetic and unfair to the other party if you ask me!!! If you are not ready for a relationship, why not disclose that right from get go as opposed to wasting everyone's time with your lies and deceit? Don't you think it would be much easier that way and still maintain your integrity and respect as you would have come correct? Well most people dont think that way. I remember the first conversation we had and it was magic from get go. We both knew what we wanted so decided to take things slow. Things were really good between us and I’d never felt like that about anyone in so long. You made me feel wanted and appreciated for who I am but I don’t know if all that was just a front. All I wanted was to...

Bleeding heart...

Isn't it funny how we all want a good man or woman when searching for love but don't know what to do once they come along? You come across as someone that know what he/she wants but when deeper into the relationship, you are confused all of a sudden.  That's just too pathetic and unfair to the other party if you ask me!!! If you are not ready for a relationship, why not disclose that right from get go as opposed to wasting everyone's time with your lies and deceit? Don't you think it would be much easier that way and still maintain your integrity and respect as you would have come correct? Well most people dont think that way.  I remember the first conversation we had and it was magic from get go. We both knew what we wanted so decided to take things slow.  Things were really good between us and I’d never felt like that about anyone in so long. You made me feel wanted and appreciated for who I am but I don’t know if all that was just a front. All I wanted was to b...